To mark this event we will be sharing stories from our clients and our staff will be taking part in activities in and out of work to raise awareness. Here is L’s story…..

My first relationship was when I was between the ages of 14-17, that was abusive.

At that time jealousy was seen as love, if he wasn’t jealous then he obviously didn’t love me. I hadn’t seen healthy relationships growing up so didn’t know what was ‘normal’ and not. It was physically abusive too.

All my relationships have been abusive in different ways, physically and emotionally abusive. My most recent experience of abuse took everything from me though.  I lost my children.

I thought he was prince charming; but he was a bully and thug. He did everything for me I the house, he helped with the things I couldn’t do or weren’t confident to do, but he was destroying me at the same time. I saw his discipline with my children as him trying to get a healthy routine in place, I had been told via Claire’s law that he had been abusive in past relationships, but we had discussed these and I felt he had been completely open with me about his part in unhealthy relationships of his past, he made out his ex’s were the abusive ones and I believed him. Even after I lost my children I stayed with him, social services were honest and told me if the relationship continued the likelihood of me getting my children back was slim, but I still stayed, trapped by him, lying to social services about still seeing him, still being hit if I found something funny and he didn’t, not letting me sleep and being kept awake all night by him. I was aware too that he was secretly telling social services we were still in a relationship. I felt I couldn’t call the police because social services would find out.

I did try to end things a couple of times, but he would choke me, this was his thing, if he did leave he would take one of my dogs, knowing that they were so important that I would allow him back.

The day I decided it was over, it wasn’t what he had been doing to me that made me call the police, but he was abusive to one of my dogs, it was odd, but I felt that my dog was so helpless. I also knew I needed to call the police, I was petrified of social services but knew I needed to be the one that called the police, not my neighbours.

I am now focusing on getting my children back, this is the most important thing to me. I finally feel positive, he warped my mind so much, I’m clear now. I know how hard it is, I regret not listening to people who told me, the people who genuinely cared about me.

I now know that I fell for someone that wasn’t real.